For those of you who have been following our series on “what our kids need to succeed”, it’s becoming more and more apparent that our kids do not only need to have cognitive skills – the kind of intelligence that gets measured on IQ tests, including the ability to recognize letters and later read and comprehend, to calculate and detect patterns, etc. but that they also need certain character traits that will help them persevere when encountering and overcoming failure. Traits such as grit and self-confidence, persistence and self-control.
Today, we’ll look at one more such trait as laid out by Jackie Gerstein of User Generated Education, and that is having a vision for the future, or what others may call having dreams and aspirations. Vision, simply stated, is seeing your purpose in life. It’s tied in to knowing who you are and what you can vision yourself doing with your talents and desires. What we need to learn is how to use those talents and desires in living fulfilling lives.
“Without leaps of imagination or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all is a form of planning.” Gloria Steinem
How do we teach our kids to keep an eye on their vision? How do we help our kids take part in an extended, high-stakes version of Walter Mischel’s marshmallow experiment, where kids are offered two marshmallows if they decide to wait a bit longer, instead of eating the one that’s placed before them at that moment? Creating a vision and making that vision happen takes “active optimism”: you have to believe in yourself and in your future, and then you have to actively pursue your plans.
So what can parents do to help their kids develop their vision for the future?
You can help your children discover their dreams, passions, and interests. Some guiding questions to help them identify and articulate their dreams include:
- Given no restrictions, what would you like to do in your spare time?
- If you could wave a magic wand and be or do anything you want, what would it be?
- In one year from now, 10 years from now, what would you like to be doing that would make you happy?
- What would your life be like if it were perfect?
One way to tackle these questions is to create a Vision Board – a collage of inspiring pictures, motivating quotes, personal affirmation cut out from magazines and other printed materials. Your kids can add personal photos and their own thoughts to this board to help them put their vision of their future in concrete terms. Here’s a description from Page Turner Adventures on how to work on this project.
Dreams will only come true if actions are taken to achieve them. So you’ll need to find a method for your kids to reflect on progress towards their dreams.
- What did you do today, this week to achieve your dreams?
- What obstacles are you having or foresee having in progress towards your dream?
- How can you overcome your obstacles?
- What resources did you find that can help you fulfill your dreams?
